Hello, T New Dawn,
Yours is such a thoughtful and thought-provoking note. Thank you for this:
"With sincere respect (I'm not being sarcastic): I'm both glad and sorry that you've bravely put your ignorance on display here. You seem to believe that this interaction was not really about race but about neighbors/rules/etc. This is an example of that old saying: The devil's best trick is to convince you he doesn't exist. I'm not looking for devils; the point is -- Whiteness is extremely skilled at hiding itself as "normal."
I hear you on the devil's best trick. I am giving this serious thought.
Also, you say you grew up around "nice white" people. Does that mean they were fair to you? Or did you still feel that heavy White privilege at every turn?