Member-only story
Addiction Story #16, Sweet Pea: Big Bowl of Popcorn Doesn’t Ease the Pain
Yesterday, rather than face up to and work/pray through unease and unhappiness, I tried to fill the void with popcorn for dinner. It did not help. Here is #16, Sweet Pea, in my flower-titled series about sugar and overeating addiction.
At about 5:20 p.m. on Monday, I decided I would not/could not make do with the baked salmon and boil-in-bag white rice Dan and I had half-planned for dinner.
It was a snowing, sleeting, icy day — a day to long for a fire in the hearth and candles on the mantel — and part of me wished to have a large pizza pie delivered to our door. Comfort. Party. Fun.
I was bored. I craved something exciting, but Dan didn’t want to order steamed Chinese food with ginger and garlic broth so soon again, not with salmon in the fridge.
“I guess you’re never going to eat that fish I bought,” he said. He had caught it at ShopRite a couple of days ago.
We had another long, serious team meeting that day re. Skippy’s path and her place on it, our place on it. We have had many such powwows, with yet another coming up today.
In the Amazon Chime gathering with several professionals, and after it, I felt uneasy. Scared, resentful, angry, anxious, weak, guilty, ashamed, remorseful, regretful…
